Me: Maybe I'm wasting your time, since you never respond to me, but I thought this was an interesting survey of elder elder requirements.
B.S.: Rich, not wasting my time at all. I think this is a great list, and have challenged our eldership with this already. As far as not responding, I have been left not sure what to think. I don't want to offend you but I don't know what you want from this church. You say we needed to have prayer and worship nights, but when we have them you don't come. You talk about the value of corporate prayer, but on Sunday mornings you don't pray with us. I love your insight, but would also love to see you show some support for what we are doing, and take action on your own ideas. I am left constantly wondering what you do support in the church other than worship team, and sometimes I wonder about that. This church is very young and still has many faults, but is still being used by God for His glory in so many ways. What we need know more than anything else is those who have such experience to lead by example to give all our new people an example to follow. Just some thoughts, hopefully not a waste if your time.
Me: No offense taken. But questions? Yes.
So you're not sure about me. This saddens me, but I'm glad you said something. Do you think "support" is how often I participate in church happenings? Hmm, well, we have been at the church for more than two years. We aren't leaving in a huff because of some imagined deficiency. Our continuing presence should say something.
You know, I'm not the enemy. And I am not a "yes" man. You won't find me toeing the line. I'm not interested in agendas. I came to the church to serve in very specific ways, according to what I believe the Holy Spirit has revealed to me. I can almost guarantee that it won't look like what you think support should look like.
I've emailed you in the past because I'm hoping I have something of value to offer. That's it. It seems like you take this input very personally, like I'm attacking you somehow. I'm not. But if what I write happens to be at odds with your understanding, well, I guess that happens.
Really, I'm no one particularly special or gifted. So my opinion shouldn't count for so much anyway. You are not my hero, and I don't want to be yours. You have your own ideas about things, and I have always said that I am not trying to change your mind. And frankly, what I think about the church is not terribly important.
So, despite what you might think, I am with you. I doubt it will ever be in the way you expect. But I'd rather see us expand our vision and our stretch our preconceptions as a result.
May I point out that the prayer nights have been scheduled for Wednesdays, a night for which I have a long-standing prior commitment? Thursday night is worship practice, so no bible study. And I have been at nearly every worship time. And the worship rehearsal is still going on when the pre-service prayer is happening.
I hope my directness is not interpreted as hostility.
B.S.: Rich, really glad to hear your thoughts. First off we do value all that you guys are already doing at church. All I was trying to say is that I know you have so much more to offer, and have heard your heart to see our local expression of the body of Christ increase. With all our changes and transitions you and your wife are about the most seasoned people at church which does say a lot. I would really like to be able to direct people of like nature in your direction, but have yet to see that put on the table. Just to be clear I love all that you already put on the table, and everything you bring to this body, I just see more in you that is not being let out. Thanks for being a voice, it seems that itself its being lost, I fear for our future generations that seem so caught up in their own world they are missing all that is going on around them. I feel revival is rising up in the hearts and minds of this church and pray it didn't stop, but spreads. Continue to challenge me and speak out when you see wrong, or right. Thanks for all that you do.
Me: I think we all are trying to live according to the calling we have received. You are diligently doing that, and I am blessed by it. However, I am increasingly convinced that our means to accomplish this is changing and will not look like the way we have been doing it.These are "out of the box" times we are entering into.
So, I want to discern what God is doing now, and I don't want to simply cram it into my old paradigms. Maybe that's why I tend to be less than enthusiastic about "joining up" with the various church stuff. What is the Spirit saying to the church has become of paramount importance to me. I've wasted years if not decades trying to fit into the Church, but now my passion is to help the Church fit into the Spirit. I really feel called to be an agent of change according to what He wants changed.
I know you have your own ideas and experiences. My ideas are not better than yours. I really don't know what this will look like. But I've been a ways down the path before, and I know I want to go again, because I saw a little further down the path, and it's a good land, flowing with milk and honey.
That's why I'm at the church. Not to make things the way I want them, or to criticize or complain, but to walk according to the Spirit wherever He takes me. I'm hoping that a lot of others will want this too. And, I am happy to participate in how to make this happen. I don't quite know what you mean by people of my nature, but if you mean people who are hungry for the presence of God, by all means, I make myself available for you to use.
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