Predestination and irresistible grace

Calvinists seem to pretty militant lately on Facebook. It's definitely an us-vs.-them scenario, where those who deviate from their preferred doctrinal stance are deceived or maybe not even saved. Typical memes include:

One of the tenets of TULIP is Irresistible Grace, which basically means that God has already picked those who will be saved. Some ancillary principles that descend from this include

1. God chose us, we did not choose Him. 
2. We don't participate in any way in our salvation. 
3. We don't make a decision to believe the Gospel. God has already arranged it, and at the exact time of His choosing, we came to Christ.

Of course there is plenty in Scripture that suggests this:

Mk. 13:20 If the Lord had not cut short those days, no-one would survive. But for the sake of the elect, whom he has chosen, he has shortened them.

Jn. 15:16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit — fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.

Ro. 8:33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies.

Ep. 1:4-5 For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love 5 he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ,

2Th. 2:13 But we ought always to thank God for you, brothers loved by the Lord, because from the beginning God chose you to be saved through the sanctifying work of the Spirit and through belief in the truth.

Jn. 15:16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit — fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.

1Pe. 1:1-2 Peter, an apostle of Jesus Christ, To God’s elect, strangers in the world, scattered throughout Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia and Bithynia, 2 who have been chosen according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through the sanctifying work of the Spirit, for obedience to Jesus Christ and sprinkling by his blood: Grace and peace be yours in abundance.

1Pe. 2:9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.

By the same token, there are Scriptures that indicate the opposite, that we have the ability to choose to come to Christ:

Jn. 7:17 If anyone chooses to do God’s will, he will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own.

Ja. 4:8 Come near to God and he will come near to you.

Re. 22:17 The Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let him who hears say, “Come!” Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life.

It seems clear that people can resist God, and even live compromised lives after being saved:

Ac. 7:51 “You stiff-necked people, with uncircumcised hearts and ears! You are just like your fathers: You always resist the Holy Spirit!

Ja. 4:4 You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world is hatred towards God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.

2Pe. 3:9 The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

Jesus, Peter, and Paul commanded their hearers to repent, which seems like an appeal to human will:

Mt. 4:17 From that time on Jesus began to preach, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near.”

Ac. 3:19 Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord...

Ro. 2:4-5 Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realising that God’s kindness leads you towards repentance? 5 But because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God’s wrath, when his righteous judgment will be revealed.

2Ti. 2:25 Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth,

Paul acknowledges the work of the devil in obstructing people:

2Ti. 2:26 and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.

And then there are verses like this, that contain both concepts:

Mt. 11:27-28 All things have been committed to me by my Father. No-one knows the Son except the Father, and no-one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. 28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

What are we to make of this seeming contradiction? Should we do as the militant Calvinists do, and stridently assert our correctness? Should we be us-vs.-them? Of course we must stand for the truth of the Gospel, but is TULIP the hill to die on?

We believe the first mistake to be avoided is to suggest that God is a binary being. He's not. We find this via the many logical paradoxes in the Bible. God doesn’t look at things the way we do. He declares in Isaiah 55:8:

For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways… As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.

A paradox is 

a statement that, despite apparently sound reasoning from true premises, leads to an apparently-self-contradictory or logically unacceptable conclusion.

The Bible has many paradoxes. For example:

• In order for a seed to germinate, it must first “die” being a seed - I Corinthians 15:36-38
• We are in the world, but not of the world - John 17:14-16
• We are exalted through humility - James. 4:10
• We ares strong by being weak - 1 Cor. 12:10
• We receive by giving - Acts 20:35
• We are free by being slaves - Rom. 6:18
• We gain by losing - Phil. 3:7-8
• We see unseen things.

And,  

• We conquer by yielding. 
• We find rest under a yoke. 
• We reign by serving. 
• We are made great by becoming small. 
• We become wise by being fools for Christ’s sake. 
• We triumph through defeat. 
• We find victory by glorying in our infirmities. 
• We live by dying.

And God Himself is paradoxical.

• Judge, but merciful
• Lion and the Lamb
• King, but a servant
• Compassionate and patient, but destroyed entire nations
• King and dying Savior

The point is, God is an unresolved paradox. We might not ever understand the intricacies of an infinite God. In fact, it would be presumptuous to demand that He fit into our system of binary logic.

Therefore, it is not hard to accept that He can be completely sovereign AND allow us free will. We can be chosen AND yet chose for ourselves. He can know everything about the future but still allows us to walk through it ourselves, freely taking our own paths.

The second mistake should not make is to assume that if you're not a Calvinist you must be an Armenian. Just as we should avoid binary thinking regarding God, we should avoid it regarding other people. People don't fit into our neat little boxes. We presume so many things about who is right and wrong, who is saved and not saved, and who is sinning and who is not. We are quick to ascend the throne of judgment when perhaps we ought to be a little more circumspect.

Make no mistake, however. There are certain truths which cannot be negotiated. Most important is there is only one way to repent and be saved, through the blood of Jesus Christ.

The third mistake we might make is to look to man for our understandings and doctrines. While there is value in the wisdom of studied men, our ultimate source of truth is the Word. The Bible is our only completely trustworthy source of truth, illumined by the Holy Spirit. All of man's doctrines must be tried by this plumb line.

So are we predestined? Yes. Is our will involved? Yes! The two do not contradict. In fact, much of what God has set before us is conditional. We would call it Conditional Predestination. His will is not thwarted, because it is His will to choose us and also let us choose Him. He has the ability to know everything and still allow things to play out. He intervenes in the flow of history, yet still history plays out.

These are interesting paradoxes, things that we are able to consider more easily when we admit that not everything is black/white yes/no on/off. We think that is what is meant by having the Mind of Christ.